VanillaAfro.com

[Little Jack Horner]

Here I sit with 10 hot dogs steaming waiting for my boys...OOPS here I sit with 9 dogs and kraut still waiting..damn it 5 down and wheres my homies...You no good pricks I just ate 10 ---with...Damn you's Im bursting out of my schmedium ... What's it gonna take? Chilli-dogs? How bout Cheez-Wiz? Alittle Texas Tommy action?Please come back I took a bite out of the dog..He's at the vet they say a couple stitches and he'll be as good as new...Dont let me fall off the Diet Wagon Im down to a 48 waist come back to PATS !!!!

[owner of pat's]

Why did everyone leave? Was it my mutt? Or was it the portly bartender? I'll tell you what...Next week we are going to slash prices and we are adding a new menu item...Patsies patties...this hot new item is a quarter pound hot dog shaped like a hamburger with saukerkraut with green food coloring to give it an irish feel...oh btw you can also order it "without"....Also one of our bartenders is offering free "re-Fi" evaluations for anyone looking to make that special addition to their house....Hey...if that's not enough will bring back the name Frosty's and all the crackwhores in for free handjobbies. We're also putting a 2 inch extension into the backyard so things should get a lot roomier towards the back half of the bar.

thanks in advance for coming back, Don Glamenco AKA PIston Honda

[Dog at Pat's]

"Ruff ruff ruff ruff???? Ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff? Ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff. Ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff ruff-ruff ruff ruff Quinny's ruff?? Ruff, if ruff, then RUFF RUFF RUFFsssss!!!!!!!!"

[58 yr. old HOMO at Pat's]

"Hey Fat Jack! Since the softball team isn't coming back anymore on Sundays (and Quinny & Wolf can't watch over your son while you're at work,) I'll take lil' Jack out back & watch over him!!!! (My only demands are that we are ALONE out back & he doesn't cry when I consistenly beat his ass in the 40 yard dash!!! He just can't keep up with my pervertly-sick desire to win foot races against chubby 6-year old kids!!)

[TGATSU]

Dear Pat,
Ive taken my posse to more fertile grounds...You need to make your bar more handi-cap accessible...When I pick up a retarded,HIV ridden , 5 .00dollar crack whore for a night of The Hub I need to take her to a fine drinking establishment to seal the deal !!!My pick-ups need doors that swing open they can't read in or out or push and pull...A more sterile inviroment is necessary..I cant be putting GHB in a glass with dog hair in it...My fine lady cant be injecting her AIDS COCKTAIL in your feces filled bathrooms...You will lose a huge client base without these renovations Pat...Remember retards money is just as good as Keiths....