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Below are the past and present deep thoughts (inspired by Jack Handy but unlike his Saturday Night Live thoughts)
I read through these again they really suck...unless they have curses then for whatever reason their mildy funny, I guess i should curse more
3-12 - I'm surprised the Phillies haven't called on Jcass to be their 5th starter...
3-11 - Hear about Elliot Spitzer? It isn't even really alarming that he's been with whores, the more alarming thing is he paid $5500 for one. Jesus, now we know why this
country is in debt, our politicians don't even know what $500 can get you these days! Let me be Elliot's economic whore adviser...I can put together a stimulus package where everybody wins!
3-10 - Did you hear about the Vatican's new list of sins? I was so close to heaven but now because of my massive toxic waste dumps i'm damned.
Is it me or are they just begging for moral relativity arguments? Who knew that our pope's nickname would be captain obvious
8-27 - forget civil liberties and all that junk, my main concern is getting schmedium into the official English vernacular. If I have to settle for shmedium with no c...I will...
8-26 - Some teams are just way too good at softball
8-25 - If the best things in life are free how much do the worst things in life cost?
8-24 - When people say that something is the best of both worlds, what other world are they talking about? This question probably isn't supposed to be answered but I'll take a stab at it and say the Bizarro world, just don't ask me what the Bizarro world is
8-23 - How come Wilford Brimley isn't still doing Oatmeal commercials?
8-22 - Not thinking for 4 months is very refreshing
4-10 - Don Imus is a nappy headed ho
4-9 - Now the Doors People are strange has really great lyrics, BUT this line here, "When you're strange...No one remembers your name"...Don't people remember your name easier when you're strange?
4-8 - by JWolf, "When people say they could care less" they are saying the wrong thing because they are saying that they COULD care less, the correct thing people should be saying is "They couldn't care less" to better get their meaning across, I think even Lono would agree on this one. I.e. Lono couldn't care less about my site
4-7 - I do a mean John Fogerty impression
1-8 - Bald Bull is one of the greatest video game fighters of all time this side of Von Kaiser
1-7 - life is like a rocky ship sometimes, you may feel lost at sea, you might need to put down an anchor to keep the boat afloat, or you might run into a one eyed pirate named Rusty who will take your home, your family, and even your dignity. you see the parallels don't you?
1-6 - thoughts of the day inhabit no space or time or should it be nor time?
1-5 - how come athletes in professional sports are all getting the flu?, christ I never get sick and i sit on the computer all day
1-4 - death is inevitable but you sucking ass is not, so stop sucking ass
1-3 - did AC/DC really expect dirty deeds to be done dirt cheap?
1-2 - In the words of the great Ron Bennington, Anorexia can't be a disease because how can something be a disease that can be cured by eating pizza
1-1 - Dick Clark has balls as big as grapefruits
12-8 - 12-31 - New Years resolution....do more thoughts of the day....and try to think once a day
12-7 - people lie all the time...but I swear I don't
12-6 - Why do weathermen think they can change the weather, when they can't even predict it right?
12-5 - my heads hurts
12-4 - Finally a Philadelphia sports team gets a break. I hate to think this, but I think that the break the Eagles got may just be one setting all of us up for a bigger failure...
12-3 - Always recognize that human individuals are ends, and do not use them as means to your end. - Kant12-2 - going on a ship that isn't sailing and isn't even going to attempt to go out in 30 mph winds really gives you the idea that the captain is a total pussy
12-1 - it's time to start thinking about Christmas gifts, you know what that means long lines, high prices, and more shit to throw out. Not to mention lovely gifts
11-30 - the human condition is one of pain, suffering, pleasure and happiness followed by waiting, lots of waiting...eh not really it just sounded thoughtful
11-29 - Do you want fries with that?
11-28 - just remember if you get fired today, you can always find another job. Even if it involves saying, "do you want fries with that?"
11-27 - teachers are the most underpaid profession. Why don't they wise up and start teaching everyone the wrong shit?....so that they can run everything
11-26 - if there really was a big brother would it be all that bad? He would take us to baseball games and the park..and be the father we never had
11-25 - is motion sickness caused by motion or by sickness?..................Motion you idiot
11-24 - repeat after me, next time i push instead of pull, I will not be embarassed11-23 - Happy Belated Thanksgiving...Imagine saying this to your family after you...FORGOT...to show up for dinner
11-22 - the night before Thanksgiving is the biggest bar night of the year, I tend to disagree and think that this has been replaced with the night before Arbor day, otherwise known as "Arbor Eve", but that's just my opinion
11-21 - what does the word meaning, mean?
11-20 - think about all the bad stuff you've done, if you should be in jail for 20 years, then take a momemt to thank God....unless you are visiting my site from jail.
11-19 - Winning a softball championship is glorious11-18 - ever notice that Snoop Dogg was laid back but he had his mind on his money and his money on his mind?
11-17 - live boxing is a lot of fun to watch unless you are in the ring
11-16 - a violent beating in North Philadelphia was followed by a senseless beating of an old hag
11-15 - next time you say something add senseless to it, and your message will be heard.11-14 - The St. Joes basketball team looked ok for a team losing a bunch of players, but they are missing one key ingredient, a guy with a good afro
11-13 - even though Tom Emanski won back to back to back AAU national championships, the Full Moon softball team's upcoming championship is way more important than any of that crap.
11-12 - why the hell haven't we been to Mars yet?
11-11 - Next time someone asks where you will be in 10 years, tell them you will be standing over their grave site, they will get a real hoot out of that
11-10 - I'm surprised there's not that much text message spam
11-9 - hear about these people making money off of online video games by selling shit in the game for real money? Well, They make a lot of money doing it, the problem is they throw back all the money they've made to Merlin, because he's got it like that
11-8 - history doesn't repeat itself, because if it did then we could never have ancient history
11-7 - How funny is it that at the voting polls they have who to vote for in Spanish...and make it really easy to vote, yet the election questions on certain bills are phrased in such a way that you need to have at least 2 Masters degrees to understand them
11-6 - If you wouldn't walk around the block at 2am, your neighborhood isn't safe.
11-5 - Is Dr. Ruth dead...actually no...people are just really sick of her...either that or she is dead in Dr. Phil's closet
11-4 - when someone says they don't have an opinion either way, hit them real fast and see what happens
11-3 - what's so great about air dusters, all they do is move the dust somewhere else?
11-2 - if they legalized drugs wouldn't it be weird seeing newscasters do coke?
11-1 - There is no better poster child for excessive drug use then one Keith Richards
10-31 - I was really hoping I would see some Johnny space commander halloween costumes this year
10-30 - ever get the feeling you are being followed? If you answered yes, call a shrink now.
10-29 - The Philadelphia Eagles are on the verge of sucking horribly again
10-28 - good luck in North Carolina Sparkie, once you get near Richmond you will understand how far away North Carolina really is...
10-27 - we live in the freest country in the world, except for Amsterdam and probably some remote island
10-26 - thank God people aren't saying "hug it out" anymore10-25 - thoughts of the day are overrated
10-24 - you know how i know you are gay? Because you have a picture of a vacation spot taped to your computer or desk at work.
10-23 - Donald Trump should start donating a lot of money to charity because he's getting older and really needs to start thinking about the whole hell thing.
10-22 - seeing one of your favorite teams lose to an inferior team hurts bad, but not as bad as seeing your favorite team lose in the final seconds, then getting yelled at by a bunch of drunk rednecks.
10-21 - If sleeping 12 hours then going to IHOP isn't the best thing you could do on a Saturday morning, it's definitely at least a close 2nd or 3rd.
10-20 - Flying isn't too scary for me, but right when the plane is taking off, it does cross my mind that in a few short minutes i could be tumbling down 10,000 feet in burning wreckage. And then I reassure myself, ah people won't be too upset if I'm gone.
10-19 - give a man a fish and he will eat for a day, teach a man to fish and he will buy a lifetime supply of corn at Wawa.
10-18 - Why are mimes so goddamn scary?
10-17 - Since I am teaching Lono how to live, my thought for today is buy one drink for a friend and you will be rewarded for one day, buy many drinks for a friend and you will be rewarded for life
10-16 - a hard fought loss is sometimes the only way to an easy victory
10-15 - when someone talks about getting back to the basics, do they really have any idea what they are talking about?
10-14 - your last thought is only as good as yesterday's thought about today
10-13 - ok that last thought was way too inspiring. Here's one for you, no matter what you do today, it won't mean shit tomorrow10-12 - inspiration comes in many forms
10-11 - when Mr. Rogers said it was a beautiful day in the neighborhood was he talking about the weather? Or the low income housing?
10-10 - next time you get your car inspected don't ask them for the $659 special like I did....you'll regret it
10-9 - i've fallen way behind on my thoughts, that's ok i can just put in filler thoughts like this one
10-8 - I was wrong about my 15 seconds of fame, once ESPN found out that everything was right in the cosmos they decided to give me 15 more seconds.
10-7 - cell phone contracts are harder to get out of than selling your soul to the devil.
ME: Yes I know Mr. Satan...but I really think that my soul is an important part of my life, and well last time we talked the reception was really bad and I thought you said SAVE your soul not SELL your soul..
SATAN: Oh God that's fine I'll let you have your soul back, just this once..you know demons were counting on that extra lost soul being there so i'm doing you a huge favor here....now your cell phone on the other hand....
10-6 - love should be everywhere...even Arkansas
10-5 - stay alert....stay alive....you missed it, it was the last exit you asshole10-4 - even if your flight is on time it's not....at the airport.....even if it's delayed all night you can't have a cot.....at the airport.....and for some reason the flight attendants they are hiring now are not hot....at the airport....and it goes on like this
10-3 - A good leader is hard to find, even in a shitty basketball league10-2 - There should be beer guys in the upper level at Eagles games. Why make the people that crave beer the most run in the Boston Marathon to buy a stinking 7 dollar beer?
10-1 - Philadelphia is a tough city, with tough people, except for me, I'm just goofy
9-30 - when someone says they got up on the wrong side of the bed, how the hell did they know, because about a minute ago they were fucking sleeping, and about a minute after waking up all you're doing is cursing the alarm clock
9-29 - Mother nature hates our softball team. Talk to her Jcas...taaaaalllllk to her
9-28 - with all the guns in society, the one thing we are lacking these days is a good knife fight
9-27 - next time you hear someone say stream of consciousness, tell them there's no such thing, that their fucking stream dried up a long time ago
9-26 - first it's smoking, next is donuts, next are chips planted into our arms that buzz us when we think about internet porn. I know it's a big step but one we should all think about. No, not internet porn the other thing about big brother.
9-25 - if everyone grew 1 foot tomorrow, we would all still be shorter than Wilt Chamberlain. Is this Wilt Chamberlain?
9-24 - ok i've been really lazy with my thoughts, but think about this, as crazy as I am having this web site, wouldn't i be crazier if i updated it every day?
9-23 - Aerosmith still puts on a good albeit short show9-22 - my 15 seconds of fame happened to be on TV with a Yuengling Lager, letting all the world know, as Lono would say, that everything is right in the cosmos9-21 - The Phillies have to be the most agonizining thing on TV to watch next to American Idol
9-20 - even at 5:30am there are hondas with tinted windows racing like idiots on 95
9-19 - as a wise man once said, time keeps on slippin slippin slippin into the future
9-18 - ESPN has finally decided to try and ruin the Monday night football song. YES, we know it's a good song but guess what it's not good after seeing people brushing their teeth to it every 5 seconds
9-17 - When the hell are they going to decide to make a pork roll cheese and egg sandwich? Morons I tell ya
9-16 - You know how I know I'm gay? Because every time I think of a good thought, I don't post it because I think it's too gay to post
9-15 - who am I kidding I haven't had a lot to think about, except deciding whether or not to choose the Pork Roll or Ham, Egg, and Cheese sandwich for lunch
9-14 - i've been very bad with updating my thoughts, I think it's because i've had a lot to think about
9-13 - You know how I know you are gay? You get excited when they play Bon Jovi anywhere, and even with your bad voice you still sing every fucking word
9-12 - You don't know what's like to be the sad man, to be the bad man....behind a white afro
9-11 - it's been 5 years since 9/11, I guess we're safer. You know I can't make this thought funny without being a total jerk
9-10 - You know how I know you are gay? Because as you're reading this you are thinking of ways to decorate your computer
9-9 - How good is the 70's song Groovy Situation?
9-8 - seeing your sister say she fucked the whole band, even if it's in a play is still disturbing
9-7 - when is corduroy going to make a come back?9-6 - ever notice that the places where food is stored are some of the dirtiest joints on earth?
9-5 - pain is inevitable, so you should go to the dentist if you have to
9-4 - Labor day is a great holiday, it gives us working stiffs a chance to hang out with all those loser assholes that are off every day
9-3 - now I understand that Chick-Fila-A is trying to get us to all eat more chicken, but that still doesn't get around the fact that everything they have tastes the fucking same
9-2 - double header baseball games should not be missed9-1 - life is short but so are midgets
8-31 - in the interest of this not becoming Quinny's pet peeves of the day, here's a thought for you, when somebody sticks a hot poker up your ass don't coming crying to me
8-30 - for those of you who have satellite radio, even though they say they don't have any commercials, how come it seems like every 10 minutes there's another fucking commercial about what's on next or even a real commercial for some comedian appearing at shitdick's comedy cabaret
8-29 - ever notice how the saying "let's face the facts", is usually followed by not only not a fact, but one of the biggest lies you'll ever hear
8-28 - if you laugh to keep from crying, then you should try to cry to keep from laughing. I tried as a kid to do that in church, I could never get it down, but it's worth a new shot...
8-27 - I talk to myself sometimes, and yes I answer myself..shit i must be nuts..i kind of even answered that
8-26 - You can tell a wise man by the amount of rubber bands on his door handle
8-25 - they can call Pluto a fuckshigglestick for all I care. If it's not a planet it's not a planet it's not an opinion, it's science...
8-24 - Smitty's blog is alive, but only in our hearts
8-23 - on second thought...yes i would like another beer8-22 - Good morning America how are you? Don't you know me I'm your native son?
8-21 - When are religious zealots around the world going to realize that blowing up someone is not what God wants?
8-20 - do the people who do herpes ads get a lot of shit from people?
8-19 - Thats Retha Franklin, She dont remember, The queen of soul
8-18 - people in Philadelphia think Tom Petty is Elvis
8-17 - smarts only get you so far
8-16 - There's no such thing as free mini golf8-15 - ever see those classmates.com ads? What 1950's yearbook maker do you have to know to get in one of those?
8-14 - After a long weekend one can only hope for a short week
8-13 - in the game of war everyone loses, except for the ace of spades
8-12 - how many of you are more scared of this lady, then the terrorists who captured her
8-11 - Lono's blog has reached epic proportions, so epic in fact that he even has a blog devoted to blasting him
8-10 - After all these years SPAM still exists and still sucks
8-9 - I think people are getting close to realizing that reality T.V. producers and actors should be shot in public
8-8 - let's party like it's thought 199. Ok that was really stupid, this thought sponsored to you by Halls Mentholyptus when you don't give a shit about bad breath and just want to get rid of your fucking cold.
8-7 - The Floyd Landis story, How one amish lad once on the path of rightiousness fell into a dark cavernous pit of cycling steroid hellfire8-6 - online poker is a weapon of mass destruction
8-5 - Manayunk is way too far away from the rest of civilization
8-4 - like one great singer has said, I love the nightlife, I love to boogie on the discooooooiiiiiiiie
8-3 - Cheesy 80's music should be a staple in any shitty bar, not just gay bars
8-2 - saying I love you to someone you don't know well before you hang up the phone is really funny, try it
8-1 - August is here, get ready for 100 degree weather for a month, but football season is coming7-31 - I think they should ban 31st's in all months, it just doesn't seem right, especially when you have a shit month like February that is not only spelled wrong but got a measely 29 days and on confusing leap years 28.
7-30 - a Sunday without softball is like a ship without an anchor or a homeless guy without a dirty sweat shirt
7-29 - champagne is way too good
7-28 - when are people going to stop watching law and order?
7-27 - the only problem I have with sushi is I don't want my meat to be crunchy7-26 - Wednesday night ball is still a lot of fun
7-25 - how come everyone calls my cell phone at the same time?
7-24 - if the world is an illusion, then consciousness is its driving force and since consciousness is all we have anyway we can't prove if the world is real or not
7-23 - some of the most stupid things you will ever see will be on an in flight tv7-22 - i can't get this damn Octupus's Garden song out of my head
7-21 - if you are caught in the desert and you only have one wish, make it for them to build a bunch of casinos with down pillows on the beds
7-20 - although fun, getting drunk on a plane gets you surly at the baggage claim
7-19 - bright light city gonna set my soul gonna set my soul on fire7-18 - packing luggage is great compared to the dentist, but not much else
7-17 - laziness is the mother of....
7-16 - Lono, next time the movie attendant says "enjoy the show", reply "thanks cunt" it sounds better and I think you will get a much more interesting reponse than "you too". You may also want to mix in a "what did you say punk", "sure thing captain moron of the SS AMC", or for an even more interesting response, "thanks, enjoy your minimum wage employment and mopping up the sticky roach infested floors too you dirty piss swallower"
7-15 - Why when they are rebuilding a city do they have to build one house at a time?
7-14 - don't forget your booties 'cause it's cooooold outside today...it's cold outside everyday
7-13 - sorry been slow updating the site lately, my computer has some sort of palsy
7-12 - metal softball bats CAN be broken7-11 - Why can't people compare apples and oranges?7-10 - There's no such thing as a non-addictive drug
7-9 - say what you want about the U.S. and politics. We're right about one thing that the rest ofthe world is not, soccer sucks7-8 - Lono's blog is better than my site
7-7 - if there's no steak sell the sizzle7-6 - the thoughts were funnier in the beginning, oh well go fuck yourself
7-5 - when someone says this is the stupidist thing I could possibly write, they probably should of thought twice about writing it
7-4 - When planning a BBQ, make sure you have enough ice and a pee tester for your pool
7-3 - The best part about Jersey is cheaper beer
7-2 - crazy limo drivers are a man's best friend
7-1 - the only thing superman does is catch big objects that are about to hit the ground6-30 - Don't ever get out of a cab on the street side6-29 - It's not unusual to be loved by anyone - Tom Jones6-28 - Why is it that the Sixers decide to make all these daring draft night moves in the weakest NBA draft ever?
6-27 - the day that people are replaced by machines, most likely we won't know whether we are fully human anymore anyway.
6-26 - I heard it from a friend, who heard it from a friend who, heard that you loved man meat
6-25 - the only thing changing is constant.
6-24 - Why does everyone go 100 on the NJ Turnpike ?
6-23 - ever notice that everyone tells you they are doing fine when you ask them how they are doing...but most of the time people are doing shitty
6-22 - people are strange, but people with goofy web sites are stranger
6-21 - The Top 5 Reasons I shouldn't joke about the Holocaust
5.) The fifth and most obvious reason, I'm not Jewish
4.) As I walked out of my house on Monday there were snipers across the street brandishing AK-47's and speaking in only Hebrew
3.) Mass genocide has nothing to do with frizzy hair
2.) Kosher hot dogs may be some of the most delicious food on the planet earth
1.) How the hell am I going to run for president in 2016 on a pro holocaust joke platform?
1A.) Yank may be looking at my web site
6-20 - I took Jcass's advice and re-examined my jokes, they're only mildy funny
6-19 - some say you can't joke about the Holocaust, obviously I'm not one of them...
6-18 - Top 5 reasons you can't blame Hitler for the Holocaust
out of politeness to our Jewish brethren I am removing this thought
6-17 - Why is a gay man talking about how Saturday's alright for fighting, what with a pillow ?6-16 - The top 5 reasons or top 10 reasons you can't blame on ESPN is so dumb, there are at least 10 reasons you can't blame anyone for anything.
6-15 - Why the hell won't they stop talking about Geno's steaks? Has there ever been a point in human history with less news to talk about ?6-14 - Am I the only one who speeds up when they see these?6-13 - going with Lono's great insight into life/death take a look at this
6-12 - Why is it that you don't remember dreams even though they happened in the last 8 hours?
6-11 - Fishing trips without any fishing are likely to contain an awful lot of drinking6-10 - Dominos Pizza blows
6-9 - Mark my words, Tully Nuts will be the death of all mankind
6-8 - Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, but most of the time you just end up throwing the controller
6-7 - I dropped my car off for service today I'm sure it will cost 462.87 to service6-6 - today is 6/6/6 a time to reflect on all the good things you've done
6-5 - bringing back another classic, It takes a big man to cry, it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man
6-4 - If psychics were real wouldn't they be in charge of everything?6-3 - when thinking of thoughts of the day sometimes i draw a blank
6-2 - Cassidy better watch it, he's pushing the envelope a little too far
6-1 - As a kid I loved birthdays, now I just hope I make it past my birthday (in 2 days)
5-31 - be careful what you wish for, especially if it's a horrible death at the hands of a bear
5-30 - One of the worst things about being a woman has to be stalkers, I swear I'm not one, no really are you reading this?5-29 - To honor the men/women who have fought and died for this country, the thought of the day is
why is it that women love men in uniform? Is it because their junk looks bigger?
5-28 - Have you ever walked through a drive thru?5-27 - Bringing out a classic, Why does corn come out as corn Don't start reading this after a large meal or a small meal for that matter?5-26 - It's Friday of a 3 day weekend, Beer me...
5-25 - Is it just me or does the guy from American Idol (Taylor Hicks), look just like Jay Leno?5-24 - Why at the doctors when they call you out of the waiting room do they put you in another waiting room for 40 minutes?
5-23 - People coordinating with cell phones to get on TV should be hung in public. That way, we get what we want and they get what they want.
5-22 - If america sucks so bad, why do you live here?5-21 - Is it just me or does The Sopranos get worse every week?
5-20 - American Idol contestants are the scum of the earth
5-19 - Saturday was for the wives, but Friday at the Copa was always for the Girlfriends...
5-18 - Whatever happened to.....the 1900 house? How angry did those fuckers get when they had to churn butter?
5-17 - Say no to drugs, but yes to chemically enhanced substances
5-16 - There's no such thing as a stupid blog, only stupid bloggers blogging
5-15 - Are you a materialist or dualist?5-14 - To all the Mother's out there...Happy Mother's Day, and to all the MILFs out there email me your digits.
5-13 - Jim Norton is fregin hilarious...
5-12 - Think of a number from 1 to 10, you're thinking of 7, creepy huh ?
5-11 - Why is it that I have a lot more ear wax in one ear?
5-10 - If Virginia is for lovers what is West Virginia for?
5-9 - Put another in the win column for the Fightin Phils5-8 - When called upon to deliver, a vanilla afroed gentleman is almost always suitable for the job
5-7 - I'm pretty sure i'm the worst catcher in the Tri-state area
5-6 - What ever happened to the club? No one uses them anymore ?
5-5 - If you don't get lost in Jersey, you've been there to much
5-4 - Life isn't fair, so you might as well cheat
5-3 - Jews of a feather stick together...5-2 - Can't get enough of those Johnny Cakes!
5-1 - Never hold your farts in. They travel up the spine, and into your brain, and that's where shitty ideas come from!! -Mb
4-30 - Munchkins have no place on a baseball field
4-29 - I hope our bar league softball team can muster up enough strength in our loins to take at least 1 game out of 2 this Sunday
4-28 - my dad worked for 37 years as a cop and lived to tell about it4-27 - You know you've made it when you have your own action figure4-26 - Bruce Springsteen playing songs from 1890 was surprisingly good...
4-25 - Don't you just hate people that say "he was my rock during the rough times", oh he was was he, you faggot.
4-24 - bar fights are like assholes, they stink and only shit comes out of them
4-23 - Weddings are fun especially when your balls are busted the entire time
4-22 - Check out these great thoughts, courtesy of Anchorman Ron Burgandy4-21 - only 1 in 100,000 people in life ever kill someone, great thought huh ?4-20 - When a priest says you may kiss the bride, does he think of little boys?
4-19 - although we all wish it could, life can't be a bachelor party forever.4-18 - Darren Daulton can talk to lizards, but does he still talk to Jim Eisenreich?4-17 - everyone has to go see this movie
4-16 - The Sopranos was really good this week, and correction 4th wife
4-15 - Vito is going to end up on Big Love as his 5th wife
4-14 - every girl is in love with a gay guy at least once, and we're not talking as a friend
4-13 - Why do people go through hell in a hand basket and not just hell, isn't going through hell enough ?
4-12 - death is inevitable, no matter what Dr. Phil says
4-11 - sorry for that previous thought of the day
4-10 - the next time someone asks you for directions, tell them to get lost4-9 - our softball lost both of our games, but winning isn't everything, just ask the members of the team of the past 2 years
4-5 - my knee hurts, my back hurts, at least my mule doesn't hurt...think of that when you're down I promise it will help, except if your mule hurts
4-4 - out of death comes new life4-3 - Why is the weather always shitty on opening day, and why do the Phillies always lose?
4-2 - famous people have feelings too
4-1 - bachelor parties are only fun when there are VIP tables involved
3-31 - Be Savage Aaaagain
3-30 -
Mo·he·gan (mo-he'g?n)
n., pl. Mohegan or -gans. formerly inhabiting eastern Connecticut, with present-day descendants in southeast Connecticut and Wisconsin. The Mohegan broke away from the Pequot in the early 17th century under the leadership of Uncas.
b. A member of this people.
2.) The Algonquian language of the Mohegan.
3.) a type of a beer that can only be enjoyed if drank for 4 straight days3-29 - Remember, when you bet in poker, there's no such thing as picking on the big stack...
3-28 - The Facts of Life has been off the air for over 15 years, yet it's story and meaning is still pertinent today
3-27 - the word greatness may be the most overused word in sports
3-26 - How good is George Mason ?
3-25 - these days, it's hard to find a good grafitti artist
3-24 - vanilla afros look great on tv.3-23 - it's surprising how hard it is to come up with good thoughts
3-22 - can't get a read of him....kids got the alligator blood
3-21 - the people that are really crazy are the ones who can't admit their crazy
3-20 - If you see someone holding a sign that reads John 3:16, give them a good kick in the face.
3-19 - Keepin it real, should be replaced with keeping it cunty, you'd be surprised at how well that rolls off the tongue, how are you doing Quinny? Good, I'm keeping it cunty
3-18 - If I had a million dollars I would buy the rights to the song If I had a million dollars and destroy it
3-17 - watching 3 events in one day is good, 4 not so good.3-16 - When planning to drink all day it is probably not wise to drink all night
3-15 - when thinking deeply, try not to think too much or you may out think yourself.
3-14 - obviously this thought of the day thing isn't working
3-13 - Big Money....Big Money...no whammy...in memory of a fallen hero
3-12 - 90% of people are idiots and 10% of all people think you're an idiot, so where's that leave the other 22.5% ?
3-11 - Nintendo games are still fun, especially at 5am
3-10 - this time next week the NCAA Tournament will be in full swing, and if you don't care FU...
3-9 - sometimes you can win trivia games without cheating
3-8 - basketball is a game for young men, young men who don't drink and smoke.
3-7 - you had to be a big shot didddddddddddja had to open up your mouth
3-6 - slurpies with massive amounts of alcohol will be the death of us all
3-5 - when they say someone is a man among boys, do they mean that that guy can kick everyone's ass ?
3-4 - when the going gets tough, the tough get internet porn
3-3 - as a great man once said, life can be tough sometimes...3-2 - going to a Prince concert at 12am and drinking before and during it on a Wednesday night might not of been the best decision in the world...
3-1 - it may not be a good thing to have this lady teaching our kids. That's a man baby! Although I can remember having non-transgendered teachers that looked worse than this thing.
2-28 - Did you know? "Gras" is French for fat and "Mardi" is French for Tuesday. Contrary to the popular belief that it is just a mumbled french-cajun version of "Show me your tits"
2-27 - I'll be honest with you, I love his music, I do, I'm a Michael Bolton fan. For my money, it doesn't get any better than when he sings "When a Man Loves a Woman".
2-26 - Sunday is a day of rest, especially after a Saturday filled with a glorious array of red bull and vodka
2-25 - never judge a book by its cover, unless that book's cover is titled, "photographs of farm animals in compromising positions"
2-24 - In the navy Yes, you can sail the seven seas In the navy Yes, you can put your mind at ease In the navy
you can place gay pictures of yourself on the internet
2-23 - May I have you attention please, will the real Steve Jeltz please stand up, please stand up2-22 - the price is wrong biatch2-21 - Snuff film mishaps, on the next Geraldo
2-20 - The Houston orchestra does a mean Eminem2-19 - if you're getting busch you are getting lucky and if you are getting lucky you are getting busch.
2-18 - a good way to look at life is a bad way for someone else2-17 - my afro is gone, and so is my personality i could not for the life of me think of a good thought of the day.
2-16 - your chances of winning the power ball lottery as quoted by a lead lottery official is "dick"2-15 - if a vice president shoots someone in the woods does he make a sound ?2-14 - the happy birthday song should be burned in effigy2-13 - weathermen everywhere have to come the realization that a big snowfall is more important than the birth of Christ2-12 - Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight, Gonna grab some afternoon delight2-11 - The thrill of victory is so quickly replaced by the agony of defeat2-10 - Don't you wish your girlfriend was hot like me?...Don't you?....Don't you?2-9 - No man can be rich who cries fearfully and considers himself to be poor - Boethius2-8 - forgetting to bring a back up roll of toilet paper to the bathroom is really shitty
2-7 - God I hate villanova, can you believe at the game against St. Joes at the Palestra their answer to St. Joes fans yelling "This is Our House", was "This is Penn's house"?
If your answer was what is wrong with that, please leave this page and type www.villanova.edu and hit go
2-6 - ever have one of those days at work where you felt like you got nothing done? Guess how I felt at work today....2-5 - The Rolling Stones are sickeningly ugly2-4 - Where is my dirty hair ball
Where is my 70's Song
Where is my happy ending
Where have all the afros gone
2-3 - wing bowl was a bad choice....2-2 - with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face you get sprung2-1 - Fuck super bowl commercials1-31 - if we don't know how good we had it until it's gone, if it's never gone then do we ever know how good we had it? And what is it anyway ?1-30 - go get your assless chaps....1-29 - Why are all the mines suddenly unsafe now? For instance there have been over 3 mine fires in the past 3 weeks, you had people in the 1940's working in a fregin black hole and no one got hurt1-28 - without cell phones a whole generation of people would be lost and less annoying at the same time.
1-27 - RAMONE.....bring me a female comedian with talent...I'll explain later1-26 - Why am I so thirsty on Thursday?
1-25 - Why is it that all that is for certain is death and taxes, why not death and petroleum jelly or better yet newspapers and taxes?1-24 - How can there be so many Rite Aids and CVS drug stores?1-23 - If you were to take all of the dumb people in the world and throw them into a big room together, on the outside of this room you would most likely become dumber.
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